Mentoring

The mission of The Hawthorn School is to assist parents in the intellectual, moral, physical, and spiritual education of their children. This formation in virtue fosters respect for every person, a desire to serve God and others, and an optimistic attitude towards life's challenges. Mentoring is a personal means of education that tailors the mission of the School to each student. Each student is a unique soul, and the individualized attention of mentoring respects this truth. Through conversation, mentors guide mentees in self-knowledge, help them to set goals and develop friendships, and deepen their spiritual life. The mentor looks out for his or her mentees, showing concern for how they are doing in their classes, if they are forming virtuous friendships, and their overall welfare. The guidance of the mentor is tailored to each student so they can reach their full potential. Mentoring lies at the very heart of our mission.

This formation takes place during monthly, one-on-one conversations between the mentor and mentee. The meetings are relatively short, focusing on the mentee’s well-being and on any goals relevant to his or her formation. Another essential element of mentoring is family partnership. The mentoring program at The Hawthorn School reinforces the values mentee receives at home and seeks to compliment the family in its role as the primary educators of their sons and daughters. The mentor offers the family a perspective on their child’s character in a setting away from the home, and, together, the mentor and parents partner for the good.

Number and Duration of Meetings

The mentor meets with each mentee at least once a month. The meeting is one-on-one where mentors can give their full attention to the mentee. Accidental conversations in the hallway, quick checkups, group meals, sideline chit-chat, etc., although encouraged and quite effective some times, do not take the place of a mentoring meeting. Although a meeting may be longer, especially at the beginning of the year, 15 minutes will quite often be sufficient. For Lower School students, 5-10 minutes will be sufficient in most cases.

Nature and Scope of Advice Given

Mentoring seeks to help each student in the areas suggested in the mission of the School: intellectual, moral, physical, and spiritual. But before explaining each area in detail, there are some general considerations that are worth discussing. The conversation between the mentor and the mentee should have a relaxed tone — an exchange among friends. It should have the tenor of a friendship of an older sibling with a younger one. There are certain subjects that should be brought up regularly that the mentor should be familiar with:

The Mentor/Mentee Conversation

The mentor should always make the mentor/mentee conversations an occasion for the mentee to feel he or she is understood. It’s not the time for reprimands or guilt trips, but quite the opposite. The mentor tries to create an environment where the young person opens up because he feels he is being heard. This, of course, is particularly important for older students as they are trying to exert their own personalities. The mentee should know from the beginning that this conversation is not a time to complain about teachers or his parents. The mentor will listen and help the young person understand why his or her parents want this or that or why that teacher gave that assignment.